In this context, it is on my daily run that I escape those relationships and revel in my own Fortress of Solitude. Certainly, I am by nature an extrovert but, as is often the case with outgoing types, I have an internal introverted side that has evolved with age. In fact, in a recent re-take of the Myers-Briggs Personality Indicator, I came quite close to flipping from an “E”, which I’ve been my entire adult life, to an “I”. Has running made me more introverted or has my desire for more solitude made me run more?
Typically, I am the first one awake in my house. As I go through my pre-run routine I savor the quiet of the pre-dawn hours and linger over my coffee. As I step off my doorstep and begin to run the old diesel engine in my chest begins to slowly crank up and my mind begins to wander. After about 10 minutes I find myself breathing to the beat of every footfall, I am aware of the noises in the forest around me but only peripherally. Mostly, I am absorbed in the inner life of my run. Like most of us, I am often asked, “what do you think about for all that time you are running.” And, I am not being sarcastic when I answer, simply, “Nothing.”
You see, on those early morning solitary jaunts I am not really alone. Typically, bopping along the trail chasing the beam of my headlamp, I am accompanied by myriad thoughts and ideas, joys and concerns, passions and people. Some days my mind jumps around like a rabbit, while other times it settles calmly into a tortoise-like trance. My life is full, my focus is deep, and my racing mind settles into silence. In my Fortress of Solitude I find answers to questions I didn’t know how to ask and solutions to problems I didn’t know existed.
Then, running into the rising sun and returning to my doorstep an hour or so later, I am ready and willing to deal with the rest of my life and all its relationships, with the peace of mind that regularly accompanies the solitary runner I am more than content to be.
AJW’s Beer of the Week
Call for Comments (from Bryon)
- Do you enjoy stepping out of your daily life to spend time running by yourself?
- What do you think about when you run?
- … and just for fun, what’s your Myers-Briggs Personality Indicator? (Online test)